Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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