does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize