We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
