Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
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