Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
dude i'm inner monologue high
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize