1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
