Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
