That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
I showed him my bush... on skype.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
