Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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