He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
