At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Randomize
