He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
