im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
