Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize