I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
