I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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