I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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