so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
