This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
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