so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
