you guys were way drunker than both of me
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
