wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
