So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
