Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Reggie can tackle my bush.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
