I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize