My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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