If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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