nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
