don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
