Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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