i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Randomize
