i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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