So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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