either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize
