the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
