I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
