i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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