"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Randomize