shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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