no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
