I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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