my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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