lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Randomize
