am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
