check it out our google latitudes are spooning
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
