Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
