"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
