There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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