You're my little dorito
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Randomize
