I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Randomize