THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
