She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
